This actually isn't a real email.

Oh my goodness I honestly really don't know what to say. 

Good things: We are teaching Brother Beaty. He is the non-member husband of a cute little family in the ward. He's had a calling teaching primary and everyone has been wondering why he isn't baptized. The time was right and the Bishop invited him to be baptized and he accepted, and they chose us to teach him (even though he obviously knows a ton already because he teaches primary). But it's one of the things everyone has to do before they get baptized. So we really lucked out big time. It's a real honor to teach Brother Beaty. He is so ready and seriously, I love that family. So that's happening this Saturday. 

We had a date for Valentine's day. he he. With our bff Taylor Adney who is an RM who discerns our emotions and is great and her nonmember "friend" who we are going to start working with hopefully. As in, hopefully that turns out successfully. 

I'm sorry. I don't have much for this week. Missionary life just kind of blurs by. 

Love, Rachel

A pretty hard week but I feel pretty good about life so it's ok.

Hi family,

 

I don't have much to say this week on account of we walked everywhere and there were many miserable moments where we wanted to cry and die. Simply because we just walked for hours. Lesson learned from this "bike" week: we are not doing that again. Although at the time, there really seemed to be no other option. It's hard when you don't know the ward members. But all the ones I've met I've loved.

 

What I'm mainly working on right now in my life is balance. Namely, figuring out how to care about missionary work, but not care too much. #impossible

 

But really. More than once this week I got to that place where you just are wound so tightly emotionally and care so much with so little control that I just snapped (internally; I only wish I could be one of those people who just let loose and was allowed to just have their crazy moment. But alas, I'm far too socially indoctrinated for that) and was released of the care, but then also felt like I wasn't being as diligent as I could be, which starts the process all over again. I think, though,that I am slowly getting better. I can see now that it really is counterproductive to the work to feel so much responsibility, and be so emotionally wound into it. So I have to figure out how to be healthy without letting go. And let's face it, I couldn't let go if I tried. So I don't think that's going to be the problem.

 

It's funny though because this week, Sister Wilkins and I--and we have no idea how this happened--slept in until 8:30. That's like 2 hours. I haven't slept in at all, let alone until 8:30, in 10+ months. We have two alarms too. It was a tender mercy of the Lord, seeing as our bodies were super exhausted from all the walking. As much as that was the weirdest thing ever, it's also pretty incredible to say that that's the first time I've slept in in 10 months. The missionary life is pretty impressive to me.

 

We walked on the UALR campus (University of Arkansas Little Rock, "You-lurrr" "Yule-errr") thinking maybe we could reel in some college kids. Well think again. I forgot how unfriendly college life is sometimes. People acted so surprised when we even said hello. It was pretty hilarious. l laughed a lot.

 

Sister Wilkins is pretty funny, too, by the way. We appreciate a lot of the same hilarities of life. I really love all the missionaries we are around, too. It's so nice to be around good missionaries and to not feel so alone in the world. Really, a caring district leader makes a big difference.

 

Sorry, this letter is really scattered. There's not much to report on. Wait, oh my gosh, I'm so excited! We're going to the temple next week! I could die! I'm so happy. Also, transfers are next week, and I don't think I'm getting transfered, but who knows. I would be way sad. But then again, it's my last transfer in AR so maybe it would take the pressure off. But I love Little Rock. And Sister Wikins. And, again, all the other missionaries I work with.

 

Love you guys!

 

Love, Rachel